Let it Be...Embracing The Story That Is
I have been on a journey of mindfulness for awhile now. To live in the now and accept what is, has never been my go-to way of dealing with things. For some reason when I had kids this just intensified. The pressure I put on myself to “make things perfect” took on a whole new level of intensity. So this is in all actuality a “process” I am still and will forever be working on. I try to practice meditation daily in the hopes of increasing my abilities. I hope you heard the “try” in that sentence, sometimes it is once a week, sometimes I get it in daily and sometimes I go weeks without doing one, but I keep trying. I am currently using the Meditation Studio app and I love it, mostly because my mind wanders a lot and it helps direct me through the meditation process. A few weeks ago I was headed into a very big week, the week before school starts always feels a bit crazy to me. Two of my kiddos are in Middle School and my other child does a mix between school and home-school. So we had school supplies to get, a home-school room to clean and organize, lesson plans to work on, lockers to load, registration to conquer, and the last week of summer to enjoy and unmarked bucket list items to cram into our week.
I woke up early, with thoughts of chaos floating around in my head, and decided to get in some yoga and meditation. I was sitting in my backyard feeling all of the weight of the things that I had to do, and all of the pressure from what was coming. I picked the meditation, “Let Things Be” led by Ashley Turner. I settled in hoping to get off my mat with clarity, and conviction for a powerful day. I breathed in and out, and then she talked about the power of letting things be what they are. What if we stopped trying to control, trying to always over plan and prepare? What if instead of letting things go, which feels very much like something else to put on our to-do list? What if we were able to just let them be?
She then suggested making a list of things that feel overwhelming or out of control in our lives. The bad and good of meditation for me is that I get right into all the stuff I have been trying to avoid. So there I was on my mat, and all the things I had been avoiding that brought on hurt and overwhelm just came up. Pick one she said, and then focus on just letting this be. Wow, this brought up a lot of resistance inside of me. I didn’t want to let things be what they were, I wanted them to be improved, I wanted things to be different. I tried just saying, “Let it be.” and then I was totally singing along with the Beatles to
“Let it be, Let it be.
Speaking Words of Wisdom,
Let it be.”
I focused on one thing, one person, one moment that had felt hurtful to me the day before. I sat and thought about that one moment in time. It had happened, I didn’t want to let go of the hurt I was feeling, because I wanted to feel vindicated in how I had shown up. But what if instead of letting go, I could just let it be. So I practiced that thought a little bit. It had happened, I had said words, other words were said. Nothing was going to change by me expecting it to be different. I found myself crying, realizing the only person that was getting hurt right now was me. So I spoke those beautiful words from The Beatles and I just “Let it Be”. I breathed in and stopped fighting, what I could not change. It was so freeing. To just let it be what it already was instead of playing the “should” and “what if” games.
So this has been my mantra the last few weeks. When my daughters locker wouldn’t open and I felt my own anxiety rising, I just turned on my Beatles background music and breathed in the “Let it Be.” words. The awesome thing about this practice, is that in that moment I was tuned into my daughter instead of my own anxiety and resistance. The locker wasn’t working and instead of playing the soundtrack of “it should be different” I was able to focus on my only job which was to “Let it Be” and show up for her. When I got a flat tire last week, and drove on it without realizing it was flat, I reminded myself to “Let it Be.” I couldn’t change anything that had happened. I couldn’t undo what I had done, and beating myself up wasn’t going to help anything or serve anyone. So I “Let it Be” and I got on with the fixing of the tire.
This for me is about making whatever is happening a neutral event and letting it be. This one statement allows me to focus in on what I want my reaction to be. If it is neutral, it is what it is, and I get to decide how to show up and what is best going to serve me and those around me. This isn’t about being passive. It is about being present.
So your exercise for the week is this:
Sit in a comfortable place and breathe in and out for four breathes
Only focusing on your breathing. The in and out.
Then take a moment to think about whatever you are clutching onto, what is hurting you, what are you actively resisting?
Focus on that thing.
Breathe in light and calm
Breathe out acceptance “Let it Be.”
Breathe in presence and power
Breathe out acceptance, “Let it Be”
After four more breathes take in one deep inhale and then a long deep and powerful exhale.
During the day, when you feel that resistance creep back in, go back to your breathe. Turn on the playlist and remind yourself. “Let it Be”
Here’s to the power of exploring that leads to thriving!